How did you get to this point?

If you’re looking at your mountain and it feels impossible, I challenge you to take a walk down memory lane. How’d you get to this point? 

This morning I found myself in the book of Numbers with the Children of Israel (I often read an aspect of The Children of Israel story and think they’re so ridiculous how they carry on and doubt, etc. But then I’m shown how similar I am to them. LOL in my every day life, I too struggle with doubt and forgetfulness and much more).

So at this particular place in Numbers, Moses has just sent a spy party out to canvas the area and find their promised land flowing with milk and honey (Numbers 13:1-3, 21-25). When the spy party returns, they tell all the people that the land flows with milk and honey, BUT there are giants living there who are much more powerful than they and there’s no way they can get the land. They even go as far as to suggest they find a leader to take them back to Egypt because they think they should have never left in the first place (Numbers 13:26-33, 14:1-4).

Y’all on the outside looking in, I am soooooooo confused as to why these fools are trying to go back! I almost threw my phone reading that – like what the heck?!

But then, I could see the correlation to that in my life. Can I be real with y’all? There are several unknowns when starting a business. Relinquish has been such a blessing and a challenge and thorn in my side. And honestly I don’t know what I’m doing a lot of the time, and I get a gnawing a feeling that maybe I should just close down shop and that “at least I can say I did it” attitude with the fake smile through the tears. But can I tell you – that mindset is such a cop out! Just like the children of Isreal, God has done numerous things to get me to where I am now. HE HAS MADE A WAY! He’s parted the Red Sea; He’s given food in barren paces; He’s led and guided me and STILL I get to a place and get presented with a few challenges and I’m ready to throw in the towel?? Like NAH bruh! Don’t just give up like that! Pause and ask “How did I get to this point!?”

Back to the story – apparently Joshua (who went out with the spy party) has some sense! He’s like (paraphrasing) “is that really all y’all saw?! God didn’t bring us to this land for us to be intimidated by the giants and go home.” And I think perhaps the dopest thing Joshua says is …do not rebel against the LORD, nor fear the people of the land, for they are our bread…”(Numbers‬ ‭14:9‬). <— Are y’all reading that?!? He said those giants are bread! That giant, that challenge, that mountain, that hurdle (whatever you are facing) should not be looked at as a wall but as a source of fuel (food) to give you energy to keep going!!!!

LORD HAVE MERCY!! I just took a lap around my townhouse y’all. I’m out of breath and don’t have anything left, so I leave you with this – as you recall how you got to this point, make sure you note every time The Lord has allocated; Every time He has made a way; Every time he has provided for you; Every time He protected you. And see there is a REASON you stand where you are today. Don’t turn back because it’s difficult or unclear. Follow through with what The Lord has started!

Love y’all! –

Lauren Relinquished ❤

Advertisements

Checking-in :)

Hey y’all!

It’s real…I really live in a new place now. New job. New place. New challenges. New friends. New license. New bills. lol Etc.

I know I’ve been a little distant lately…I’m just trying to get settled and when I tell you I am learning so much about myself – you wouldn’t believe it.

From something as small as conversations at work, to how I’m dealing with the challenges at my new place and the property manager…it’s definitely stretching and teaching me so much.

There are definitely some things that are different and I’ve had to adjust the way I do things, such as how I use my resources, how I think about things, how I interact with people, how I eat, etc. The list goes on and on, really!

But through it all, I’ve been reminded of my “root” word time and time again – RELINQUISH.

When different challenges or frustrations arise, there’s like this strange calm that comes over me and reminds me everything is going to be fine. I’ve been way more passive in situations that in the past I wouldn’t be, but I still feel this gentle whisper on my spirit telling me to “let it go…”

I can’t wait to update y’all more, but I wanted to check in and share a little as well as remind you that no matter what’s been placed in front of you, what you have coming up, what steps you have to climb – RELINQUISH and let God plan your steps and really guide your path. You don’t have to control every little thing nor have an understanding of everything to be obedient. Just let go and keep pushing forward.

Love y’all!

-Lauren

Torn.

Truth is…I don’t know how I feel.
I get this falling feeling in my stomach at times.
Sometimes my eye sockets well up with mini oceans.
Other times I’m so giddy I could skip and jump rainbows or something.

I’m all over the place is what I am. And in the midst of it all, it still feels pretty unreal (but then the lack of pennies in my savings brings me back to reality lol).

I don’t know about this whole moving thing right now. I knew I was in for a real treat from the start though. When I started dreaming, praying and investigating my options, I remember it all felt so easy. Not that kind of “it’s never going to happen” easy, but that kind of easiness that makes you feel like it all be a smooth transition and all your ducks will fall right into place.

And it’s not that my ducks aren’t in place, but no one told me my feelings would be all over the place like this. Sheesh. I’m not sure what to feel. It’s all so new…and kind of scary quite frankly.

This will be my first big move on my own. In a way college didn’t completely count because I never took all of my furniture and I was only a 75 minute drive away. Now, I’ll be 450 minutes away 😫 (ay, but there are a couple people I’m ok being that far from 😅 just kidding – I love everyone lol)  Oh and did I mention how much I’m going to miss my momma and her cooking??

I know new adventures await me. I know it’s been God approved, but I must admit…right now I’m a little torn…

…but in a good way.

Yes, my feelings are all over the place, but it’s only because I realize all the gems that I’ve been blessed to encounter; the dope people who’ve enriched my life; the people who love me; the new experiences I’ve had here *sniffles* I miss my framily  and this city already! 

I’m tearing away from the old and being introduced to the new right now…and its different, but I can’t say I don’t like what I see 😏
As the day grows closer, everything is getting more and more real *bites nails*

I’m nervous, but I’m still very expectant!

Say a prayer for lil’ ol me!

Updates to come –

Lauren😬

Expecting.

I’m sitting here thinking about this time last year when I was preparing to go on my very first mission trip to Cape Town, South Africa. I was nervous and excited all at the same time; I felt so blessed and privileged for the opportunity to embark on that adventure. I was also super expectant and just knew that it would be life-changing…and it was.

Today, almost mirrors last year. The only thing that separates then from now is 365 days of time and space. Just like last year, I’m nervous and excited and feeling incredibly blessed for the opportunity that lays before me. I will be embarking on a new adventure and relocating to Georgia! And I am expecting this May and beyond to be nothing short of life-changing, as well 🙂

As you can imagine, I’m stoked for the newness, but you know “new” can also be kind of scary. Not to mention, transitioning mentally, physically and spiritually into this new season has its moments. There are ways you prepare yourself (and others) for what’s to come, but I think you can only prepare so much.

As I reflect on last year, I think about what I did to prepare for that almost 8,300 mile voyage to Cape Town South Africa. I got shots, I shopped, I put in vacation time, I gave notice, I fund-raised, I prayed, etc. And there was another thing…I’m not sure I realized how instrumental this was to the preparation process at the time, but now it’s glaring—

I EXPECTED.

I expected to experience and see God in South Africa. I expected Him to meet me there and show me new things. I expected that I would return home changed. I expected I would grow deeper relationships and gain new friends.

I had a mindset of expectancy that said “I’m expecting great things and I’m not taking ‘no’ for an answer.”

I believe this attitude opened me up to fully experience my situation in a different way.

I’m not talking about what you think “should” happen or how you think it “should” happen, I’m simply talking about expecting something to happen.

Expecting means to anticipate the occurrence of something with reason (www.dictionary.com). You’re not closing yourself off to the details of how it can happen, but leaving yourself open for it TO happen whichever way it may. And honestly that takes a great deal of relinquishing control so you can just experience – you know…undergo, meet, feel, savor, enjoy…

So just like last May, this May – I am expecting.

I can’t promise that I’ll ever be fully prepared for the journey ahead, but I can promise myself that I will expect to experience God, life, surprises, love and growth.

Sincerely an Expectant Lauren ❤